AH, LOVE. I coveted The Lovers Card in The Major Arcana as a teenager but it never popped up for me. In fact, psychics often responded to my “when will I get a boyfriend” inquiries with “you’re not paying attention in school.” What the heck? This card, the 6th in the Major Arcana represented by Gemini, is an elusive mistress.

How I Apply The Lovers Card in The Major Arcana to My Life

My “The Lovers” card, made out of construction paper.

Here’s the Skinny

The tarot (my deck at least) doesn’t really care about whether or not you have a date for the prom. I’m reminded of my mother, who used to say “What if this doesn’t work out. Are you enough?” 

Being in a loving relationship with a cute house, a nice dog and a few cucumbers growing out back is a beautiful, beautiful thing. But if you don’t know who you are without all that? In the words of Oda Mae Brown, “you in danger girl.”

Tarot will often tell you to nurture yourself when you want to know how to attract someone else. It’s not that you have to be perfectly confident to be in a relationship, it’s that you should have some sense of who you are before you share yourself with someone else.

So, that being said.

What Does it Mean when The Lovers Comes Up in a Reading?

Well, let’s take a look. The Lovers are a mirror image to The Devil. The Devil can be about indulgence, addiction, and feeling “bound” to something. Or, in the case of toxic relationships, someone.

The Lovers, on the other hand, are free. They represent the choices that serve your higher self. When I say higher self I mean the person you are when the outfit is perfect, your favourite song is playing, and you’ve got enough money to order the lavender oat milk latte from that cute barista.

The Lovers show you there’s a choice to be made, and you’ve got to lead with your heart on this one.

How I Apply The Lovers Card in The Major Arcana to My Life

The Rider Waite Smith Lovers

Knowing The Lovers in the Biblical Sense

There’s a lot of Adam & Eve imagery in the RWS tarot. The Lovers card in the Major Arcana says sure, you can stay in the Garden of Eden forever where everything is perfect. Or you can gobble up some knowledge, learn a difficult lesson and go out into the “real world.”

It’s like that moment in Friends when Rachel leaves her husband and cuts up her credit card. She could stay comfy forever, or she could serve her higher self. It’s a long and winding road, but she ends up with some pretty amazing life experiences! (And Ross, I guess.)


Sometimes it’s easier to fantasize about the perfect relationship that’s going to fix everything. It’s much easier than digging deep and fixing yourself. But becoming a whole person with dreams, goals, drive, and desire is what’s going to make you most attractive to potential mates. Follow that voice inside and make the choices that support it.

Curious if The Lovers will come up for you? Book now and see what develops.